75 Thoughts Everyone Has When They Watch The First Episode Of “Sherlock”
Did he just say his name is Microsoft?
1. Did I accidentally put on Saving Private Ryan?2. Oh nope, there’s Martin Freeman.3. I like that minimalist apartment — oh, he’s depressed.4. A blog? There’s going to be blogging?5. #BilboBlog! Maybe I’ll make that Tumblr…6. Is that Tumblr taken?7. NOPE, MINE.8. No one could dry-swallow a pill that big.9. Where’s Sherlock?
10. My, people die quickly in this show.11. How can you send a mass text that big? I think the limit is 10 numbers.12. I hate mass texts, so many responses — wow, that guy looks like British Bruce Willis.13. Mike Stamford’s tie looks like a pack of Fruit Stripe gum.14. WHERE IS SHERLOCK?15. Oh, that must be Sherlock.16. Good Lord, he’s a dick.17. Why is he such a dick?18. How did he know John was a soldier — how does, what?19. FRUIT STRIPE TIE.
BBC / finalproblem.tumblr.com
20. What, he — wait, how did he — John’s brother is an alcoholic — wait — riding crop.21. Yep. That’s Sherlock.22. I think I’m in love.23. But he’s such a dick.24. But I love him.25. Do I have daddy issues?26. Maybe I should go to therapy.27. Or start a blog? I’m registering BilboBlog now.28. That longhorn skull is wearing headphones.29. Did he just liken murders to Christmas? (I love him so much.)
BBC / sherlock.soup.io
30. I need to move to London.31. I could totally find a job in London.32. I wish my life was set to this music score.33. OH SHIT, DID JOHN JUST CALL SHERLOCK AN AMATEUR?34. Ok, so this is how — how he knows all that stuff about people — I, wow.35. That. Was. Amazing.36. My mind is exploding.37. My mind has exploded.38. Haha, Harriet.39. He might legit be a psychopath. (I love him so much.)40. “SCRUBBED YOUR FLOOR.” Drop that mic.41. That is one seriously color-coordinated corpse.42. Anderson looks like Snape’s fraternal twin.
BBC / sherlocked.wikia.com
Warner Bros. / ladygeekgirl.wordpress.com
43. Wait, can you actually call a pay phone? I should Google that.44. Oh, you can.45. This is like that movie about the phone booth, what was it called? I should Google that.46. Oh, Phone Booth.47. Is that hot chick live-tweeting this car ride?48. Sherlock’s arch enemy, this must be Moriarty.49. No one twirls an umbrella that sinisterly unless he’s Moriarty, this is 100% Moriarty.50. Oof, Sherlock, I have never seen anyone put a scarf on so flawlessly.51. OH, TO BE THAT SCARF.52. Wait, is Sherlock gay?53. He does know how to wear a scarf.54. OH, TO BE THAT SCARF.
55. How does Sherlock make money?56. OH MY GOD IT’S A CAB DRIVER.57. IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE.58. What a homely serial killer.59. Do not get in the cab.60. Call the police, they’re right upstairs.61. OH, COME ON.62. Sherlock’s skin is flawless.63. Sherlock’s cheekbones are flawless.64. I should pay closer attention to the plot.
BBC / sherlockmeta.tumblr.com
BBC / sherlockmeta.tumblr.com
65. MORIARTY. CALLED IT.66. Did he just say his name is Microsoft?67. Alright, fine, didn’t exactly call it.68. Never has there ever been a more perfect slow-mo exit.69. This must be what finding religion feels like.70. I officially have a new religion. Onto the next episode!71. THERE ARE ONLY THREE EPISODES PER SEASON?!72. I have to pace myself. I’ll wait until tomorrow to watch the next one.73. Yep, tomorrow.74. Just gonna go do something else now.75. Nope, “Blind Banker,” here we go.
BBC / johnhwatson-.tumblr.com
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