How The Summer Heat Will Turn You Into A Disgusting, Sweaty Swamp Monster
1. 8 a.m.: You wake up in your air-conditioned apartment ready to tackle the day.
8:45 a.m.: You walk outside your house and get your first blast of summer humidity. You’re DISGUSTING.
2. 10:00 a.m.: You decide to go out for a coffee run.
10:01 AM: You forgot about the soul-crushing heat.
3. Noon: After a productive brainstorming session, you and your coworkers decide to run out for a salad.
12:03 p.m.: What is this hellfire you live in?
4. 2:45 p.m.: You and your team are heading over to a prospective client’s office for a big pitch.
2:47 p.m.: Cool, you’re melting.
5. 6:30 p.m.: Your workday is done, and now you have to contend with your commute home.
6:33 p.m.: The subway is a sweat-filled cesspool.
6. 7:12 p.m.: You need take your dog out for a walk.
7:16 p.m.: A hot blast of air melts you into an otherworldly sweat puddle.
7. 9:00 p.m.: You get ready to go to your BFF’s birthday party.
9:36 p.m.: You walk out your front door and your makeup slides down your face and onto your chin.
8. 10:30 p.m.: You tried, but WHOOPS, YOU ARE FULLY A ROILING SWAMP MONSTER NOW!
WELCOME TO YOUR NEW LIFE (Until September, anyway).
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